Helper is Not a Wimpy Word

According to Genesis chapter two, we’re created to use our fierceness by serving as man’s “helper.” Does that word bother you? Helper. It sounds like we don’t get to do anything really important—we just get to “help out.”

That word always sounded wimpy to me. I felt much better when I found out that the Hebrew word which is translated into our English word “helper” is not a wimpy word. In fact, it is the same word used in reference to God as a “helper” to His people (Exodus 18:4; Deuteronmy 33:7). That’s when I realized that being my husband’s “helper” was not an insignificant assignment but one of eternal consequence.

God didn’t create woman to fill a “no big deal” role. Men and women are created with equal worth and value, given equal access to God, and both live with the purpose of glorifying Him. Neither role is inferior or superior. Each comes with its own challenges and in order to serve well in her role—a woman must be fierce. Not destructively fierce but beautifully fierce.

God wants to use the strengths He’s placed within you to fulfill His calling on your life. I love seeing how the fierce women of Scripture did this. Esther courageously stood ready to perish as she fought for the lives of her people. Deborah led the armies of Israel to victory. Priscilla once literally “risked her neck” (along with her husband) to save the Apostle Paul’s life; she was bold, fearless, and a diligent student of the Word. 

Your role as helper is to aid your husband in becoming all that God has created him to be—to be his iron sharpening iron (Proverbs 27:17). Deep down every true man of God wants to do the right thing, he wants to be the spiritual leader, he wants to live all-out for God’s glory; he doesn’t want to waste his life. When all is said and done, he wants to hear those words, “Well done faithful servant.” He wants you to be able to believe in him, to be able to say with all sincerity that you are confident in his leadership because you know he’s a man who walks with God.

You may be thinking “Not my man—his biggest dream is Sunday afternoon football with no interruptions!” Maybe that’s all you can see from the outside, but don’t discount your power of influence, as a Spirit-controlled woman, to fuel his passion for Christ.

This is no job for weak-willed women. It takes intentional dependence on the Spirit, immense self-control, and wisdom from the Word, to learn the difficult art of being your husband’s helper by challenging him to godliness without demeaning him. To encourage him to continue pushing the envelope in spiritual growth without nagging, belittling or preaching.

How will you serve as your husband’s helper today?


  • Vivian

    I pray for his passion for Christ to grow. When he is not at home, I run the home the way he desires for it to be. Those are two ways that immediately come to mind.

  • Kay


    I love this post. Indeed the word “helper” used to be a problem for me too, until I realized the very same thing. Then I was impressed with how good and capable and involved a helper our God is. If we choose to take up the role of helper has He has defined it through His actions, we have some mighty big shoes to fill!

    I visited your web site for the first time today, and I think I’ve found me a friend. We have many passions and experiences in common. Blessings to you, sweet lady, and upon all that you are doing to encourage women toward godliness. I’ll be back!

  • Kimberly Wagner


    So glad you found the site. Thank you for your encouragement and kind words. I look forward to connecting with you here, friend.

  • Kimberly Wagner


    Thank you for sharing. Praying for your husband is a huge part of the helper role. I especially like to pray Scripture for LeRoy. Psalm 92:12–15; Colossians 1:9–12; and Ephesians 1:17–19 are a few of the passages I’ve often prayed for him.

    Blessings friend!