I don’t want to be fake!
One thing that makes blogging difficult is hearing from women who really need help and knowing I’m very limited in what I can do to help. I love sharing truth with women here, but I ache when I receive a note from a woman filled with painful questions. I want to offer a hug, to reach out to tell her—God can work in this—while looking into her eyes. I would love to have real-time, real-life, daily input into women’s lives who are genuinely seeking answers and are willing to make tough choices.
But when I respond to blog comments, I’m limited to communicating with the hurting through this screen, in small doses, rather than doing real life with them.
Recently, I felt that ache again when I had a woman leave a comment saying she was told she needs to “pretend” (as though she has positive feelings when she doesn’t) and put on an act to affirm her husband. She was asking how she could spend her whole life “acting and being fake” in order to encourage her husband.
Putting on an act and being fake is never the solution to any problem.
Obeying Scripture involves hard choices—which may mean demonstrating self-control, kindness, respect, or appreciation—when we don’t “feel” like demonstrating those character traits. Choosing to “put on” the attributes of Christ is not taking on a false persona, but is cultivating His character, reflecting Him, to others.
It requires a willful choice to humble myself and call out for His grace to demonstrate to others His likeness:
[box]So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience; bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you.
Beyond all these things put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity.
Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God. Whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through Him to God the Father. (Col. 3:12–17)[/box]
You or I cannot make the tough choices that love requires on our own. It is only by crying out to God for His work of grace—asking Him for “HELP!” when we are in need of transformation.
In order to demonstrate true love to others, to look like Him, our hearts and minds must be fully renewed by the Word (Col. 3:1–10), and we must walk in the grace that is available when we are fully surrendered to God’s will and plan (Galatians 5:13–26). It is not “putting on a fake persona” but being renewed by God’s truth, which brings a change of heart, and humbly applying that truth to our lives, which brings a change of action.
I hope you didn’t miss Tuesday’s blog post where I introduced you to some of my friends who truly have been changed. They are not “faking” God’s beautiful work in their lives which has completely changed their actions. Check out their video on Tuesday’s post and ask God the same question I ask every time I sing the song at the end of the video.