It’s three thirty in the morning and every time he stops breathing I check to see if his chest is moving. He had his Plasma Exchange treatment today and it’s left him so weak he can barely lift his head.
A little more than a week ago, he was still walking and serving as my protector and strong husband. Since then, I’ve seen him loaded into an ambulance twice, bundled like a baby to transfer to another bed, by men who easily lifted his depleted body. Although he’s lost the ability to even physically sense the most basic bodily functions, has partial paralysis and much pain, his disposition has never wavered: Gratitude.
He’s told multiple people that he’s thankful for this affliction. He’s grateful for it because it’s reduced his life to the most important basics.
LeRoy keeps telling people that it is a great gift from God when He puts you in a position where all you can do is meditate on the Word, worship, witness, and pray. LeRoy reminded me that, on the cross, Jesus showed us that this is possible: to be in the most horrific and painful circumstances and still be praying for others, focused on others, and worshipping the Father. In his most horrific hours, Jesus took no thought of Himself and His pain. LeRoy is asking for grace to follow that example.
We are still waiting for a diagnosis. Yesterday, LeRoy was shipped over to another hospital in the area to have a surgical procedure and get several biopsies. He’s also had several vision exams, even though his vision seems perfect. That was all happening on his “rest” day, the day without a PLEX (Plasma Exchange) treatment.
The doctors are thinking he may actually be having two things occurring at once: a rare infectious disease and an unusual autoimmune disease. Only my amazing man could do that, live with two rare illnesses at once!
For the first time since we arrived, the medical personnel have started wearing face masks when they enter the room. I’m still kissing my man, though. Why stop what I’ve been doing throughout his two year misery with this mystery illness?
Every morning, he shares with me the Scripture verse the Lord lays on his heart and asks me to write it on the white board. This was today’s:
[box]”A man’s steps are established by the LORD, and He takes pleasure in his way. Though he falls, he will not be overwhelmed, because the LORD holds his hand.” (Psalm 37:23–24)[/box]
LeRoy is facing the biggest unknown of his life, but he is not overwhelmed at all!
Having a long history of walking with Jesus, having practiced the disciplines of daily study and meditation on God’s Word and prayer, have all prepared LeRoy to walk through this season with confidence in the Father he serves. We know God has faithfully ordained this particular affliction for His good purposes. And we pray that we will honor Him in our response to this new adventure with Him.
We’re blown away by how many of you have left comments and are praying for us! We’re deeply touched and so very grateful! Please forgive me for not replying to all of your precious messages, it is just continual medical mayhem around here, with no time to do much other than 24/7 caregiving. I’m only able to scribble out a few sentences at a time (while he’s sleeping) in order to get some kind of update out to you precious friends!
In these dark, late night hours, it helps me to write. Writing is how I process, but it’s also a form of worship for me. As I record all that God is doing, it feels like I’m shouting His praise from the rooftops!! But I’m actually hidden away in a dark room with the rhythmic sound of the IV swishing, the beeps of calls for nurses going off in the hallway, and my man pausing from breathing just long enough to make me sit up straighter to strain my eyes in his direction. I’m “shouting from the rooftops” my praises by silently typing out this little post.
Thank you for your prayers and for joining us in this latest adventure of walking with Christ.
- God’s presence is tangible and abiding.
- LeRoy’s lost his ability to walk (praying that will only be temporary), but his mind is still in tact and sharper than mine!
- The medical staff seems to adore my man and for that I’m most grateful. They are attentive and kind to him. They are treating him respectfully, which is a real blessing.
- He continues to have a worshipful attitude and shares Christ freely and winsomely.
- The PLEX treatments deplete his strength significantly. Pray for protection from any adverse reactions to the numerous medical procedures and drugs being introduced to his body.
- Pray for both of us to be able to rest and get some sleep. We both desperately need that!
- Pray for a diagnosis.
- Ask God to prepare us to receive the diagnosis in a manner that glorifies Him and to honor Him with the life changes that may bring.
When you pray, and if you share our story with others, give glory to God alone. Praying you will share the wonder and beauty of our amazing Savior with everyone who will listen!